Tru Story

Encouraging the Dreams of Others

noreply@blogger.com (Leslie McGraw) — Thu, 23 May 2013 05:24:00 +0000

Tru Story Exclusive: Back by Popular Demand

Thanks for tuning in to the exclusive series about real-life leaders, both personal and professional, sharing their own testimonies of how they made their dreams into reality.

This is the fourth entry in the Tru Story Exclusive series. This is an unpublished piece I originally wrote for a Detroit magazine recently. Instead, I decided this article coincides better with the Tru Story series. I believe readers will be inspired by the story of Detroit native, Heather Buchanan-Gueringer, and how her vision for capturing and promoting the arts in "The City" was seeded and watered.

As a college student...she contacted her professor who took her to the Director...“She took a chance,” said Heather , “if she had torn it up or seemed uninterested…who knows?”

"Imagine your ideals, then make them real."

- A Direct Quote From My Fortune Cookie, Oriental Express, 1 p.m. Lunch, Monday, August 22, 2011

Encouraging the Dreams of Others

As a poet and musician, a love for the arts began for Heather at an early age. As a college student, she wanted to put together a poetry anthology. She contacted her professor who took her to the Director at Wayne State University, M.L. Liebler. The school ended up publishing her anthology. The encouragement made the difference and set forth her vision that eventually became Aquarius Press. “She took a chance,” said Buchanan-Gueringer, “if she had torn it up or seemed uninterested…who knows?”

Help Others Find Opportunities and Encourage their Dreams

After graduation, Buchanan-Gueringer joined the Detroit Writers Guild, a nonprofit dedicated to developing writers. Here she received a lot of training on the technical side of how to design a book, before joining the board of directors, and, later, becoming the Executive Director.

In 1999, Buchanan-Gueringer decided to open a for-profit press, Aquarius Press. Aquarius Press has published dozens of books, including her own book, Dark River which is a suspense novel loosely based on events that happened in Detroit when it was under French control. Aquarius Press also publishes a regular edition of the Reverie: Midwest African American Literature Journal, where entries are accepted for poems, fiction, essays and scholarly articles.

The Vision Expands

In 2007, Buchanan-Gueringer expanded her dreams and her mission to include a specialty subdivision, Willow Books, geared toward certain genres and writers from diverse backgrounds. Since then, Willow Books has grown to include the annual Literature awards in prose and poetry and the Lit Fest to showcase winners. This year’s LitFest, held April at Chicago State University featured finalists and presenters from all over the United States.

In 2008, she began Jordan’s rainbow, named after her nephew, in response to what she saw as a lack of good books for children and young adult children of color. Her current enterprise was completed in 2012 when she founded the Metro Detroit Performing Arts Center. After the recession and decline in arts in Southeastern Michigan, she wanted to provide opportunities for young performers to learn, perform and get noticed. “As a musician, I was concerned about the lack of opportunities; artists don’t have a good networking system.”

Buchanan-Gueringer cites the fragmented literary and arts community, as well as the literacy crisis in our state, as some of the major contributors to the decline in support of the arts.

Current Projects

Currently, Aquarius Press is accepting manuscripts for its open reading period as well as entries for the Reverie. Additionally the Metro Detroit Performing Arts Center is offering lessons for new young musicians to make their dreams into reality.

“We are just trying to do our little part to keep arts alive in Metro Detroit”, said Buchanan-Gueringer.

The Opportunity to Create History by Guest Blogger Christian Cannon

noreply@blogger.com (Leslie McGraw) — Wed, 15 May 2013 12:02:00 +0000

Tru Story Exclusive: Back by Popular Demand

Thanks for tuning in to the exclusive series about real-life leaders, both personal and professional, sharing their own testimonies of how they made their dreams into reality. In explicit detail, these Tru Story guests document the every day contributions to their own journey.

This is the third entry in the Tru Story Exclusive series, written by 17-y-o guest blogger, Christian Cannon. Christian is an emerging leader in both his high school and community through work, service and activism. Christian shares the moment where his dreams became real, "On January 15, 2013 I received a letter in the mail that would change my life. It was the turning point that made my hope and dreams into substance and opportunity."

"Imagine your ideals, then make them real."

- A Direct Quote From My Fortune Cookie, Oriental Express, 1 p.m. Lunch, Monday, August 22, 2011

The Opportunity to Create History

Becoming a environmental scientist was a burning passion that I had within my heart. For 17 years this dream was built on self motivation, self determination, and a mind that was geared toward creating history. I always knew that I would pursue my dreams as a scientist, and knew that the first step to success began with my actions. I have always had a passionate interest for understanding plants, animals and the environment. Studying the grow of plants, understanding the behavior of animals, and brainstorming ways to make Earth a greener planet have been a few of the many things that I have focused on in my youth.

For the past 5 years I have dedicated my summer vacation working for a non-profit organization called Growing Hope. I have decided to become a environmental scientist who focuses on the methods of an alternative energy engineering. Throughout my high school career, I have excelled in my academics, became a student leader and community activist. However, on January 15, 2013 I received a letter in the mail that would change my life. It was the turning point that made my hope and dreams into substance and opportunity.

I was nominated to be a National Youth Delegate representing Michigan and Ypsilanti High School at the Washington Youth Summit on the Environment, held at George Mason University from June 23-June 28, 2013. This great honor was only offered to 250 Youth Delegates throughout the United States for outstanding academic excellence and sincere interest in the field of environmental science and conservation. This incredible promising event is sponsored by The National Geographic Society, The Smithsonian National Zoo, and George Mason University Honorary Advisory Board. The Washington Youth Summit on the Environment is an excellent opportunity for my future and is the first step in creating many positive impacts in the world.

Everyday day of our lives we are given the opportunity to make our dreams become our reality. As we follow our inner self in desires and passions, the process of time will make what some call dreams into reality.

Guest Blogger Simpson Becomes "A Real Writer"

noreply@blogger.com (Leslie McGraw) — Mon, 13 May 2013 10:00:00 +0000

Tru Story Exclusive: Back by Popular Demand

Please accept this invitation to tune in for an exclusive series about real-life leaders, both personal and professional, that will share their own testimonies of how they made their dreams into reality. In explicit detail, these Tru Story guests will document the every day contributions to their own journey.

This is the second entry in the Tru Story Exclusive series, written by guest blogger, Karen Simpson. In her guest blog entry, Karen shared how she started as 'a real writer' by entering a writing contest at the local community college. "I set into motion, the full power of my dream," she wrote. That dream is now alive and well with the award-winning novel, Act of Grace.

"Imagine your ideals, then make them real."

- A Direct Quote From My Fortune Cookie, Oriental Express, 1 p.m. Lunch, Monday, August 22, 2011

Ashe...A Real Writer

I think I truly began my journey toward becoming a writer 25 years ago in 1987. I was 33 years old, ten years into a dead end job, and still not sure where I was going in my life. The only thing I was sure about, was I wanted to be a writer, however, that seemed like a Don- Quixote-dream like goal that only other smarter, prettier and more imaginative people could achieve. Real writers didn’t look like me, I thought. And besides - what were the odds I had any real talent?

But then I had the wordy itch and finally it occurred to me that I at least needed to try and scratch it just once. One evening I went to an event at a local community college and saw a poster for the school’s literary journal, Northern Spies. They were requesting submissions so I sat down and, over the next two weeks, composed an essay about my grandfather. To my delight and surprise, Northern Spies accepted my little essay. There was a fancy reception and reading for those whose work they published. I remember being nervous as I got up in front of a small but appreciative crowd to read:

The Nature of Happiness.

On this winter day with cold so deep one could call the sun a liar, I have made my heart and archaeologist and sent it to sift through my past; down, down, down to the thin layer of subconscious matter that contain the faint images I have of my grandfather, who died when I was young.

Most of my memories of the Reverend Dr. John Van Catledge are created from my mother’s lore, but because he was what I wish to become -scholar, writer, teacher most of what I understand about my grandfather flows from my small collection of his photographs and written works. Few photographers caught his smile. Some might say he had no love for the camera. To me, however, he embodied the African and African belief that constant smiling denotes a lack of seriousness, sincerity and character. What the Yoruba defined as ashe, a spiritual wisdom is what my grandfather projected with his calm eyes and sealed lips.

No, he had no mirth for cameras to steal, but his written work revealed a scholar’s joy of learning, a writer’s hope filled vision of life. There is one splendid letter he wrote to my mother about the nature of happiness. It is this letter I open now because today melancholy is too good a friend, contentment seems a distant rumor, and the sun still is a shameless liar. I will read myself well and whole again.

I didn’t know it back then, but the word, Ashe literally means “ it is so”,or “may it be so.” I believe now that when I wrote that word down and then said it aloud up at the podium. I set into motion, the full power of my dream.

Ashe…it was so, and I am now the author the award winning novel Act of Grace.

A Happy Mother's Day Story

noreply@blogger.com (Leslie McGraw) — Sun, 12 May 2013 20:00:00 +0000

The Educated Emotion: A Happy Mother's Day Story: [ View the story "Happy Mother's Day!!" on Storify ]

Ashe - A Real Writer By Guest Blogger Karen Simpson

noreply@blogger.com (Leslie McGraw) — Thu, 09 May 2013 03:54:00 +0000

Tru Story Exclusive: Back by Popular Demand

Please accept this invitation to tune in for an exclusive series about real-life leaders, both personal and professional, that will share their own testimonies of how they made their dreams into reality. In explicit detail, these Tru Story guests will document the every day contributions to their own journey.

This is the second entry in the Tru Story Exclusive series, written by guest blogger, Karen Simpson. In her guest blog entry, Karen shares how she started as 'a real writer' by entering a writing contest at the local community college. "I set into motion, the full power of my dream," she writes. That dream is now alive and well with the award-winning novel, Act of Grace.

"Imagine your ideals, then make them real."

- A Direct Quote From My Fortune Cookie, Oriental Express, 1 p.m. Lunch, Monday, August 22, 2011

Ashe...A Real Writer

The Nature of Happiness.

On this winter day with cold so deep one could call the sun a liar, I have made my heart and archaeologist and sent it to sift through my past; down, down, down to the thin layer of subconscious matter that contain the faint images I have of my grandfather, who died when I was young.

Most of my memories of the Reverend Dr. John Van Catledge are created from my mother’s lore, but because he was what I wish to become -scholar, writer, teacher most of what I understand about my grandfather flows from my small collection of his photographs and written works. Few photographers caught his smile. Some might say he had no love for the camera. To me, however, he embodied the African and African belief that constant smiling denotes a lack of seriousness, sincerity and character. What the Yoruba defined as ashe, a spiritual wisdom is what my grandfather projected with his calm eyes and sealed lips.

No, he had no mirth for cameras to steal, but his written work revealed a scholar’s joy of learning, a writer’s hope filled vision of life. There is one splendid letter he wrote to my mother about the nature of happiness. It is this letter I open now because today melancholy is too good a friend, contentment seems a distant rumor, and the sun still is a shameless liar. I will read myself well and whole again.

Tru Story Explicit: Making it Real

noreply@blogger.com (Leslie McGraw) — Thu, 02 May 2013 03:58:00 +0000

Back by Popular Demand

Please accept this invitation to tune in for an exclusive series about real-life leaders, both personal and professional, that will share their own testimonies of how they made their dreams into reality. In explicit detail, these Tru Story guests will document the every day contributions to their own journey. The series begins today with my first Tru Story blog entry, written almost two years ago. It is the positive affirmations that have helped to carry me through adversity and pushed my business to new places that I had not yet dreamed. Over the next few weeks, we have success stories from an author, singer, relationship expert, business owner, and more. Stay tuned!!

“We should not judge people by their peak of excellence; but by the distance they have traveled from the point where they started.” ― Henry Ward Beecher

"Imagine your ideals, then make them real." - A Direct Quote From My Fortune Cookie, Oriental Express, 1 p.m. Lunch, Monday, August 22, 2011

Out of habit, more than anything, I have always been excited to close out my (insert fancy name) chicken and rice with a sweet morsel and a 7-word pep talk. For years, it seemed almost sinful to see groups or bags of fortune cookies with no purpose. I still don't like it when I am out and my meal date eats the fortune cookie that I think the waitress left just for me. I am convinced each fortune cookie that I have received was hand-picked. That's the way I have always imagined it: My own personal pep talk.

So Here's The Naked Cookie Everybody has to grow up sometime. Right? After seeing hundreds of these fortune cookies in rotation at the gift and party shop, I started to doubt my logic. So, I did a little research. Where exactly in China did the fortune cookie originate? How 'ancient' is the fortune cookie? Apparently, not so much. The closest thing to today's fortune cookie was invented by either a Chinese or Japanese American immigrant in the Early 1900's. In either version, the idea behind the fortune cookie was to boost the spirits of the fortune cookie recipient. In fact, Americans and Canadians consume more fortune cookies than any Asian country ever has. The flaky past and hollow, generic center of this American/Asian take-out meal staple was hard to swallow. Since I acquired my new knowledge, it makes it hard to make a logical claim that its words are sincere.

I Still Believe Yes. I said it. I still believe. It may make you question my sanity, my logic...but I don't care! All I know is it's working. Whenever I honestly believe that this is my fortune. That 'this' stuffed treat was made especially for me - the message inside is always sermonic. So, you can quote Plato or Shakespeare or Warren Buffet. But, me? I will be repeating the following words in my head for the rest of the day, "Imagine your ideals, then make them real." #trustory

Who Do You Say No To the Most?

noreply@blogger.com (Leslie McGraw) — Wed, 10 Apr 2013 08:30:00 +0000

Quit Telling Yourself No

How many times do you tell people no in the course of a day? Once? Dozens? Or..never. Recently, I was speaking with a friend about my current projects. Specifically, about how I need to back pedal on some of the volunteer and non-profit projects I have going on. She said something that has resonated with me over the past week: "every time you tell someone 'yes' you are saying no to yourself."

So, before you make tough decisions about how and who you should tell no, think about yourself, your business, your family, and your goals being on the receiving end of that no. (yikes!).

More Free Downloads from Meggin McIntosh

Still in Love

noreply@blogger.com (Leslie McGraw) — Wed, 03 Apr 2013 08:30:00 +0000

In honor of National Poetry Month, I thought I would share the poem that started the Tru Story blog. When I first showed this site to my supervisor at the time, she said, "It's nice. But, is the entire site about you?" I didn't know how to respond at the time, but now I see it is about me. At least partially it is. However, I would like to think that this blog, and accompanying actions, are bigger than myself. Bigger than my individual self, goals, strengths, and weaknesses. It is about how someone without many resources or power can find peace, purpose, and success. I think that makes this more than about me...it becomes universal.

Still in Love: A Peace To Be Spoken

My heart ain't broken

No more

But my feelings are still hurt

Open, Sore

Waking up in the night

Thinking I might have a heart

ATtack

Huh, huh... (marching)

I can't breath

But when I try to gather myself

I can't leave

Not without you

But I can't stay without Me

A shell

A piece

A hull

A leaf waiting for you to cleave

To want, to need

Me...

For life

Not out of convenience

Or in need

I am

Still in Love with ME

I am

tired of being alone without you

or lonely with you

I am

Still in love with me

I am..

My heart

My heart ain't broken

But it's really sore

So I wear protection

But then it's neglected

Limp and unfulfilled -

A suicide of a member

Still working each day

Escaped from the circle

Vicious and tangled

Old and unforgiving
Taking, taking, You Rise, YOU RISE

Losing, I'm losing

I die

I die

I die...

Still in love

With Me

I am...

I get...

Tired - but my heart don't

I feel heartbroken, but it ain't broke

A flesh wound

A bruised dream

My heart ain't broken,

Brotha, I'm a weed

Disappointment and stress

Is what I feed

On and on

It's what I needed

To get to this place where you left me

Still in love with me

I am

alone, turned wild

Illegitimate once again

A mistake that was conceived

Yet conditioned to Succeed
Don't be mad cuz I ain't

Stuck

You left me

behind to wait

In the wilderness

wit a fence around it

But I survived

when the other flowers choked

Now I am

Somebody's flower

An equal yoke

A Newfound Love

Through it all

I'm still in love

With Me!

I AM

♥.•´¯`•.¸¸.• ƸӜƷ ♥.•´¯`•.¸¸.• ƸӜƷ ♥.•´¯`•.¸¸.• ƸӜƷ ♥.•´¯`•.¸¸.• ƸӜƷ ♥.•´¯`•.¸¸.• ƸӜƷ ♥.•´¯`•.¸¸.• ƸӜƷ

♥.•´¯`•.¸¸.• ƸӜƷ ♥.•´¯`•.¸¸.• ƸӜƷ ♥.•´¯`•.¸¸.• ƸӜƷ ♥.•´¯`•.¸¸.• ƸӜƷ ♥.•´¯`•.¸¸.• ƸӜƷ ♥.•´¯`•.¸¸.• ƸӜƷ

♥.•´¯`•.¸¸.• ƸӜƷ ♥.•´¯`•.¸¸.• ƸӜƷ ♥.•´¯`•.¸¸.• ƸӜƷ ♥.•´¯`•.¸¸.• ƸӜƷ ♥.•´¯`•.¸¸.• ƸӜƷ ♥.•´¯`•.¸¸.• ƸӜƷ

Are you happy?

noreply@blogger.com (Leslie McGraw) — Wed, 20 Feb 2013 21:27:00 +0000

Monday I had a rotten day. I was sick with a head cold, sorting through personal finances, everything I scheduled for the day turned out differently than planned, I worked really hard and felt like I got nothing accomplished. We all have days like that - where nothing seems to go right except what's supposed to be left.

As I begin the third week in my year of gratitude, I see a pattern with myself: the days that I am more prepared for the day and begin in gratitude turn out better. Yesterday, I wanted to be ready for today: the week was slipping out of my hands and I needed to do something about it quickly. I woke up this morning at 2:49 a.m. and, with the exception of an hour nap, I have been up and productive. Still, I needed to find time to slow my day down a bit. So, I stopped to see my grandma this afternoon. Sure enough, her slow speech and rich stories calmed me down immediately. We looked at a couple pictures of my recent trip and watched birds outside of her window. After just 45 minutes, I left her home feeling at peace. When I got home, I saw this picture on Twitter of some African kids enjoying something we waste by the buckets here in the United States. I am grateful they have some water and grateful I have some, too. Today is a success. I am happy.

Photo taken at a @charitywater well in Kanombe Sector, Rwanda: these kids are so happy to have clean water! twitter.com/charitywater/s…

— charity: water (@charitywater) February 20, 2013

I Refuse To Be a Statistic

noreply@blogger.com (Leslie McGraw) — Fri, 08 Feb 2013 04:30:00 +0000

I went to a goal-setting workshop in January and there was a statistic given by Terry Bean that said most resolutions fail within three weeks. That is all the more reason that I am happy to be just beginning with my new year resolutions.

As many of you know, my new year begins with my birthday each year. So, on this Tuesday, February 5, 2013, I started anew. Over the next few weeks, I will be sharing my game plan for the year and hopefully hearing from readers about what's working for you.

My theme this year is:

Gratitude. Don't let me be a statistic

This theme has a triple meaning for me.

One - I am taking quite a few 'natural' leaps of faith.

Second - I don't want to be one of the millions of people who make new years resolutions and fizzle out in 3 weeks.

Third - I don't want to be like 'the others'...which sometimes includes me. Complaining and worrying about what I don't have instead of appreciating what I do.

This is my first 'Thankful Thursday' of '13 and I have so much to be thankful for. Until I get my newsletter back in full swing, here are some of my latest articles. Check them out and let me know what you think!

1. Cloud-Based Call Recording Software for Call Centers
http://www.buyerzone.com/software/call-center-software/ar-cloud-based-recording-software/

2. Is Your Call Center Customer Service Faltering? Use Performance Metrics for Call Center Software

http://www.buyerzone.com/software/call-center-software/ar-tracking-representative-metrics/

3. 3 Most Preventable Forklift Violations

http://www.buyerzone.com/industrial/forklifts/ar-preventable-forklift-violations/

4. Weighing in on Forklifts Chains

http://www.buyerzone.com/industrial/forklifts/ar-forklift-chains/

5. New Milestone for LinkedIn Increases Value for Users

http://technology.gather.com/viewArticle.action?articleId=281474981836844

6. Using Pain Clinics to Manage Chronic Conditions

http://www.lifescript.com/health/centers/pain/connect/u/using_pain_clinics_to_manage_chronic_conditions.aspx

Thanks to everyone who has read an article or all my articles. I am thankful for you!! You are part of the tru story of my success.

Happy Birthday, Mr. President!

noreply@blogger.com (Leslie McGraw) — Wed, 23 Jan 2013 20:14:00 +0000

For the past 15 years, it has been virtually impossible to go and visit my grandma without seeing "Grandma Jennie". Not only was she often outside or in the lobby when we arrived, she would often strategically need to open her door for something just as we hit the hallway. She always had something "she wanted to tell me". It was never anything that big, but she made it sound interesting by lowering her voice into a ridiculously loud whisper and hunching her shoulders in. Her art of storytelling made every word worth it.

When she wasn't giving me the scoop on happenings at the senior living, she would talk about her recipes and things that had been passed down to her from 'the old country', which I never confirmed - but assumed - was Poland.

The President

My son has had his share of play names. To mama, he is 'boo', to some family he is 'butta, and others 'junior'. But, Grandma Jennie had yet another moniker for him: 'The President.' This was due to the fact that, from his earliest stages of language, he spoke with such authority or 'with his chest.' In her natural storytelling style, she would go on to unfold all the ways she imagined him a President and pretend conversations he would have with heads of state.

At the time, it was funny but still seemed like make believe. 10-15 years ago, at the the time she would call him 'The President' the most, we had no clue of some of the white house traffic that we have seen over the past five years.

Now, that I look back I have three things...three gifts that I received from Grandma Jennie.

She never referred to my son as becoming the 'first black' president one day. She just said that she believed he would be President one day.
She never stopped believing that he would be President one day. Even when he came in and spoke quietly with his face in a permanent teenage scowl. She still would ask me how 'The President' was doing.
She always treated me like the mom of a President. She would tell me to 'get ready'...he is going to be the President one day.

Today my son is officially 16 years old and the everyday frustrations sometimes compromise the lofty hopes I had as a new parent. However, I can't help but remember that if 10 years can make as much of a difference as it has in the United States, then there is no telling what kind of a difference it can make in my child's future. So, until further notice:

Happy Birthday, Mr. President!

Naturally Me

noreply@blogger.com (Leslie McGraw) — Tue, 25 Sep 2012 07:01:00 +0000

A few years ago, singer India Arie penned a hit titled "I am not my hair". My response to that? De hell. I'm not.

Hair is a big issue for women. For African American women, hair can be life-impacting. Depending on how you wear your hair as well as the thickness, length, texture and curl pattern, something as simple as going to the gym before coming to work must be thought out. There is constant debate in the professional realm about what is acceptable for the workplace. The 21st Century workplace acknowledges, and often welcomes, Sisterlocks, 2-stranded twists, Ty Zillions, Kinky Twists, afro puffs, and flat-ironed hair that magically swells as the day wears on. Even if coworkers don't quite know what the name of each style, they can recognize that it appears more "natural" and often healthier than styles from the previous two decades. In fact, a friend recently shared her observations that, as a professor, she and other professors are actually taken more seriously when they have their hair worn naturally in soft and tight kinky curls or Afros.

Within the African American community that debate is relentless. Over the last ten years, with the help of the natural hair care movement and YouTube tutorials, I have seen a lot of progress in education on healthy hair for African American women. Education about the differences in essential maintenance, oils, and cleaning techniques are not just passed around in private circles of "socially conscious" women. As recently as five years ago, I was told by several stores in my area that they did not know what I meant by the term 'natural hair' and they did not carry "specialty products" because they would not sell. These same businesses have since wizened up! Still, learning about my own hair and placing the health of my own hair over the look and expectations of others has been a journey.

I started chemically abusing my hair when I was in high school to fit in...not with white students, but other black students primarily. Later, after many hair heartbreaks and failed attempts at detoxing from the creamy crack, I made the plunge in 2005. At first, I was like a newly saved Christian - witnessing to everyone about my hair victories and progress. I have a group of friends that are now natural, some of whom say it was after watching me make the transition.

Eventually, however, I felt as though I was in more of a box than I was before going natural. I am hair-illiterate. I reached out to communities of women who wore their hair natural. Every time I reached out to be in these sister circles, the requirements got more ridiculous than the next. It would take me years to accept that this was just another form of rejection. Use this, don't use that. Don't do this, don't do that. Don't do your own two-stranded twists because it will break your hair off. Wash your hair twice a week. Only wash your hair once every two weeks. Don't use deep conditioners because that can change the natural hair curl pattern. Deep condition once a week. Your natural hair care date is the date you have decided to stop relaxing it. Your natural hair care date is the date you decide not to get the perm. Your natural hair care date is when you make the big chop plus one inch for excess permed hair that may be at the scalp. If you put color in your hair it is not natural. If you straighten your hair or put heat on it is not natural. Buy organic. Only buy products from independently owned businesses. That conditioner has <BLANK> glycerides in it - that changes the texture of your hair. Some natural hair care vigilantes would say I shouldn't use shampoo.

To add insult to injury...I was getting it from the other angle as well: my mom would joke and said she was gonna slap me with a relaxer while I was sleep, my husband would laugh and say 'are you gonna go to work like that?'... friends and coworkers would only approve of my hair when I had it in african braids or other deeply controlled styles. Styles that hurt my hair and scalp and left me unable to touch my own natural hair in the way I wanted to.

Eventually, I had to quit listening to everyone else to an extent. Since then, I have enjoyed playing around with my hair. Below, is a collage of my hair over the past seven years. It has been such a freeing journey. As an adult that has found her own identity I won't subscribe to anyone's view of what is natural - because you have to define what that means for you. What is your true authentic self.

I Love Life

noreply@blogger.com (Leslie McGraw) — Mon, 10 Sep 2012 11:32:00 +0000

My Grandma

About this time a couple weeks ago I arrived at my grandma's to let her know in person that her little brother had passed away. Although she was sad, she was also very calm and reflective about it. She was convinced that he had left the world more peaceful than he had been in a long time. Later that evening I asked her how she was doing. She smiled and said, "I'm okay. I am just enjoying life and living. I love life."

Have a good week!

Les

Keep Cleaning until it Sparkles

noreply@blogger.com (Leslie McGraw) — Mon, 20 Aug 2012 18:14:00 +0000

Rose-Red Quartz Crystal. Sparkly, Beautiful..but not finished.
Rob Lavinsky, iRocks.com – CC-BY-SA-3.0

Opening weekend for the movie, Sparkle, just ended. I will see it later this week, but first I had to watch the old 1976 version just one more time. This has been one of my favorite movies since I first watched it as a teen almost 20 years after its original release date. One of my favorite lines is spoken by Sparkle (Irene Cara) when her boyfriend, Stix (Philip Michael Thomas) comes to her home after her sister passed away. This is the first time Sparkle has seen him since he left Harlem, and her, to try and make a new start.

"Give you a chance? Wanna know something funny? When you first left, I wasn't sure if I'd be able to live without you. Yeah, I used to sit in this room and wondered if I would ever get through another second. Can you imagine a person so unhappy? To not know if they'd live through another second? I got through the second, Stix. Minutes, days, months, weeks. I'm doing fine without you. Just fine."

I know that feeling. Once someone or something has penetrated so many parts of your life that it seems your ability to live is dependent on that person being there - the person or thing has entered our spirit.
I have discovered, like Sparkle, that I have managed to not only survive but find success even without these people and things I thought were necessary.

We have all lost people either permanently or temporarily to death, distance, or betrayal. Other losses that come with unemployment, income, and change are inevitable. The similarity amongst these losses is they all pull away from our identity. We define ourselves by our friends, spouses, children, parents, jobs, homes, weight, place of worship, income, and location. As these things change, so does our identity. That modified identity can either build or detract from one's character and spirit.

In order to meet the requirements of my next building phase, I am working on cleaning out the residue from dead situations so that I can rebuild my spirit. In other words, I am working on reducing the physical clutter that I have accumulated over the past 10 years, especially the last 5. This is my goal over the next two weeks. This week, I am focusing on my business and professional clutter. I want to create a space where my creativity can be nourished. Next week, I plan to focus more on the household items. #lesgo

My Desire to be Healthier

noreply@blogger.com (Leslie McGraw) — Sun, 19 Aug 2012 04:24:00 +0000

I have spent the last several months positioning myself for my new healthy life.
This is just the beginning!

A Healthy Les

When: April 16 through August 20, 2012 (90 days excluding weekends)

Daily Affirmation:
My Love For Myself Drives My Desire to Be Healthier.
Daily Goals: Days That I Met My Goals:
1. at least 15 10 cups of water each day 70/90
2. take my Vitamin each day 30/90
3. at least 15 Minutes Prayer/Meditation Each Day 50/90
4. at least 30 minutes of cardio each day 56/90

Please note: I did not use weight as a metric to gage my success with this personal challenge. However, I have been weighing myself weekly . I lost 28 pounds. To continue following this part of my journey, check out the Healthy Me updates.

Thanks for taking the journey with me.

Les

Waking Up

noreply@blogger.com (Leslie McGraw) — Mon, 13 Aug 2012 17:13:00 +0000

I snapped this photo as I was breaking into Ohio territory after a trip to West Virginia. I felt so alive...so Awake!

My morning prayer call began with "I woke up with a thank you on my mind". The opening was so profound to me that my eyes and head were forced open and upwards. This simple sentence was even more powerful considering that it was uttered by a woman who has acquired 80 years of wisdom and gratitude.

I have been alive just a portion of that time and I have volumes of near-death and real life experiences. I can only imagine how many heartbreaks this senior prayer warrior has endured, disappointments she has experienced, and failures she has overcome. She was my age during the civil rights era; that alone is bound to be rich with colorful and painful pieces of history. Added to her own personal struggles and losses that older adults inevitably experience, waking up with a sound mind that is fixated on gratitude and service is a huge accomplishment! That is a success that outweighs any failure that she may have encountered. Similarly, I notice that when I focus on all things I am grateful for I feel so much more engaged with life and the people and things around me. I am awake.

As I begin the last week of this personal challenge, I am surprised how awake and alert I have been. I have not been eaten perfectly and the beginning was especially rough - but I have been mindful of my eating and exercise behaviors. If I don't have a good reason to be eating, then I don't. If I don't have a good reason to miss exercising, I don't. Making myself answer these questions honestly each day is helping to keep me accountable to myself. What I have found is the more honest I am with myself...the more times I make myself push through the hard days and decisions... the better results I end up with. This week I lost 4 pounds, creating a net loss of 28 pounds since the beginning of the challenge. However, I know from past experience that weight can come and go. I am focusing on the behaviors that will sustain the weight loss rather than the weight loss itself. I am glad that I am creating and reinstating healthy habits, making steady progress, and making positive change. But, what I am most proud of is that I am awake.

Tru Story is about tracking and sharing success in all areas for personal and professional growth. The discipline and nurturing that I am developing in my health life is positively impacting other areas of my life as well. Do you have a "tru story of success" that you would like to share? Let me know as I will be accepting guest bloggers for the Fall. Sincerely, Leslie.

A Healthy Les

When: April 16 through August 20, 2012 (90 days excluding weekends)

Daily Affirmation:
My Love For Myself Drives My Desire to Be Healthier.

Daily Goals:
1. at least 15 10 cups of water each day
2. take my Vitamin each day
3. at least 15 Minutes Prayer/Meditation Each Day
4. at least 30 minutes of cardio each day
5. No fast food

Knowing When to Slow Down

noreply@blogger.com (Leslie McGraw) — Thu, 09 Aug 2012 10:45:00 +0000

I couldn't sleep so I went to the gym this morning at opening, which is 5 a.m. I got on the Elliptical machine and tried a new program which simulated going up a mountain. Every so often, the prompt on the screen would say "Prepare to stop". Several seconds later, the prompt on the screen would change to "stopping.." and the pedals become almost unmovable. Next, I was prompted to "resume workout in opposite direction".

Taken during this Morning's Workout. #trustory

The first time, I waited until the pedals stopped me and went I was prompted to resume workout I almost broke my neck trying to change my footing. The trick, it seems, is to actually slow down when you are preparing to stop. Once, you actually get to the stopping phase you can readjust your footing and prepare for the next climb. Visually (and symbolically), as seen in the screen capture to the left, it all starts to make sense as you get closer to the top of the mountain. There is no such thing as a straight road to a destination or to the top. Knowing when to slow down is as important as the "going" phase. It is when you slow down that you discover what direction you should go next.

A Healthy Les

When: April 16 through August 20, 2012

Daily Affirmation:
My Love For Myself Drives My Desire to Be Healthier.Daily Goals:
1. at least 15 10 cups of water each day
2. take my Vitamin each day
3. at least 15 Minutes Prayer/Meditation Each Day
4. at least 30 minutes of cardio each day
5. No fast food

I Feel Good

noreply@blogger.com (Leslie McGraw) — Mon, 06 Aug 2012 10:54:00 +0000

One of my generation's most widely used clichés is "how are you?" I have noticed a lot of people use this as a greeting instead of hello. Consequently, if you are naïve enough to answer with something other than "fine" or "okay" then people may look at you like you are from Mars. That is, of course, if the person who asked "how are you" even sticks around to get a reply! Another acceptable response is "good". In fact, that has been the one I have settled on recently. Here's why:

I FEEL GOOD EVEN WHEN I AM NOT FEELING GOOD

Feeling Good is susceptible to emotions. I am a "touchy-feely", introspective, Carebear-bred, people-person who feeds off of the energy of others. I can't rely on those emotions to be true indicators of how I am doing.Yesterday I felt horrible; my emotions got the best of me and I felt unworthy and undesirable. This morning I got on the scale and I have lost 24 pounds. It doesn't mean I don't have a lot more to lose - but it means I am steadily making progress. For that, I feel good.

Also, feeling good has a connotation related to being in the moment's circumstances. What I want in life won't be realized with instant gratification. I am working hard at my goals and the road is winding and long. Some days I will not be feeling good and that's okay. I recently joined a spinning class. Between the seat, the heat, and the "hills", I come and leave with a scowl on my face. However, in general, I love the class and I am excited each time I realize that I made it all the way through a class I used to be intimidated by.

I FEEL GOOD IS AN AFFIRMATION

Good in the dictionary means (amongst other things):

Being positive or desirable in nature
Having the qualities that are desirable or distinguishing in a particular thing
Beneficial to health

Basically, good is positive and that's the way I want to live my life - positively.

My cousin, Robin (L), and I at a family birthday party last week.

A Healthy Les

When: April 16 through August 20, 2012

Daily Affirmation:
My Love For Myself Drives My Desire to Be Healthier.Daily Goals:
1. at least 15 10 cups of water each day
2. take my Vitamin each day
3. at least 15 Minutes Prayer/Meditation Each Day
4. at least 30 minutes of cardio each day
5. No fast food

No Time For That

noreply@blogger.com (Leslie McGraw) — Mon, 30 Jul 2012 16:17:00 +0000

One of my favorite skits on the Rickey Smiley morning radio show is "Ain't Nobody Got Time For That". Using Sweet Brown's viral description of a fire that she shared with news reporters (http://youtu.be/C4gTQbTxDhw), the show allows people to call in with ridiculous things they saw throughout the day or things they don't want to deal with. People describe the "that" they don't want to deal with such as people that only post food pics on their Pinterest or Instagram boards, getting up early on Saturday, or mouthy teenagers and at the end of each sentence one of the radio crew chimes in with, "ain't nobody got time for that". The result is hilarious.

Action Expresses Priority

Recently, I was at a meeting where a trainer was speaking about the excuses he has heard of why people are unable to commit. Most of these "excuses" have to do with time. Throughout this personal challenge, this past week was the first week that I can honestly say I gave 100% all 5 days. I have had challenges throughout --legitimate challenges. Nonetheless, I have been increasing the importance of my personal health. In the insightful blog post: Time Management 101, We All Have the Same 24 Hours in a Day! - Marketing & Sales, the writer talks about how to assess, correct, and progress in our individual time management skills. I get a lot done each day - but I am guilty of allowing unscheduled items such as email or phone calls to dominate my day and procrastination. Of all the potential areas to improve, the one that stuck out to me the most was "I include personal life activities in my formal calendar system to demonstrate the same respect for those activities as I do in my business life". I remember when I used to write down my food prep, workout schedule, and writing time religiously. I have begun doing that again and I believe that is how I am starting to make time again. I need to see it in stone, imagine that is unmovable. So, this morning I woke up thinking about how tired I was and all I needed to do today. But, my spinning class was not an option. It was on the calendar. Therefore, I went. I am glad I started my week out this way.

A Healthy Les

When: April 16 through August 20, 2012

Daily Affirmation:
My Love For Myself Drives My Desire to Be Healthier.Daily Goals:
1. at least 15 10 cups of water each day
2. take my Vitamin each day
3. at least 15 Minutes Prayer/Meditation Each Day
4. at least 30 minutes of cardio each day
5. No fast food

Butts and Guts

noreply@blogger.com (Leslie McGraw) — Mon, 23 Jul 2012 19:30:00 +0000

Friday, I used my lunch break to explore downtown Charleston, West Virginia while at a convention. After a few steps, I noticed smoking was apparently the norm. Outside the back door of the hotel, there were a dozen employees talking and smoking. Walking along the street, employees were seen forfeiting minutes from their lunch break in order to get a few puffs. At each crosswalk, I could see drivers with cigarettes. In fact, one lady stole my undivided attention when she juggled a cigarette, the steering wheel, and a container of lip gloss all at the same time.

If I think back long enough, I guess things used to look like that back in Michigan years ago. But, it has been awhile. With all the casualties linked to smoking and new studies and knowledge available, I could not understand how anyone could pick up such a dirty habit. Back at home, smokers are not tolerated. The University campus, most public places and workplaces, are smoke-free. Additionally, smokers are made to seem less professional, clean, healthy than the rest of the population.

Butts and Guts in the beautiful historic town of Charleston.

Saturday, a friend said, "I can't believe how many smokers there are around here!" I chimed in with enthusiasm. Just as I was about to get comfortable talking about how unhealthy all the smokers were, she said, "AND...have you seen all the morbidly obese people down here with almost no healthy food options. It's like a food desert." She was right; there were a lot of heavy people moving in and out of the pizza, burger, and Asian food spots. I hadn't thought of junk food on the same level as cigarettes before this, but I can't really justify the distinction between the two. Walking along the next block, I saw a visual embodiment of my new revelation: there were several decorative containers (such as the one shown in the picture) that contained cigarette butts and discarded pizza plates. Ouch; I am so glad that I am working on decreasing my unhealthy habits!

A Healthy Les

When: April 16 through August 20, 2012

Daily Affirmation:
My Love For Myself Drives My Desire to Be Healthier.Daily Goals:
1. at least 15 10 cups of water each day
2. take my Vitamin each day
3. at least 15 Minutes Prayer/Meditation Each Day
4. at least 30 minutes of cardio each day
5. No fast food

Slow and Steady or Complacent?

noreply@blogger.com (Leslie McGraw) — Wed, 18 Jul 2012 01:02:00 +0000

A couple years ago, my water bill started to increase a little bit each bill cycle. Last summer, my son noticed a leak in the basement. When a family friend came over to inspect, he said it was because of the toilet. He fixed the leak, and consequently the water bill, but said eventually the floorboards were going to need replacing under the toilet. In the last year, my son and I have had a host of congestion/respiratory issues. In hindsight, the mold forming underneath the toilet was probably a major culprit. At the same time, the toilet has been sinking lower and lower into the floor. Enough to be concerned - but not enough to feel like an emergency. When the repairman removed the toilet (shown below), he found that I had a ton of mold that had accumulated underneath the linoleum and eaten through the floorboards. He said "it's the worst I've ever seen." The mold had to be treated/removed, wood replaced, and the entire floor redone. It was hard to imagine how extensive the damage was from the outside. From the outside, the repairs needed seemed minor. Time had avenged me for my complacency.

When the repairman ripped up my bathroom floor, (shown left), he said "it's the worst I've ever seen."

Almost every morning when I wake up, I wake up with something on my mind. Sometimes it's a song, a thought, a dream, or a memory. This morning, I kept hearing the line, "slow and steady wins the race." That's exactly how I have been feeling lately - - like I am not moving as fast as people around me. A couple hours later, I read a horoscope gadget on my personal Yahoo page which read:

"You have a unique power to change whatever it is that you don't like about where you are in life right now. The only thing you have to realize is that the change you want can't come immediately. Slow and steady wins the race. Your impatience is natural, but it is keeping you from seeing some viable possibilities..."

This struck a cord. Around Memorial Day, I became ill with a bad head cold. By the time I started to feel better, I began experiencing symptoms of the stomach flu. After almost three weeks of this "stomach bug" I finally took myself to urgent care where I found out that I had an infection as well as symptoms of a more serious condition. I was told to rest, cut the stress, go to my primary care physician, and change my diet. I felt jipped. I wanted the doctor to say it was gonna be better in 7 days and a prescription.

Over the last few weeks I have been examined in the most intrusive ways imaginable and several things have been uncovered. Basically, there is no quick fix. The only way to help my digestive issues is through diet, stress management, and sleep hygiene. Soooo...that's what I'm doing. Starting "from scratch" now that I have cleaned out my insides, paying attention to how my body reacts to what I eat, slowing down to get the rest my body has been craving. I am moving slow, but I am not complacent. Each day I am working towards my goals.

Since I started this personal challenge, I have had to keep reminding myself that this is about health - not weight. This was a reminder that, as long as I am not complacent, it is okay for me to go at my own pace. I am not in competition with anyone but myself. Yesterday, on Day 66 of this personal 90 day challenge, I weighed in 20 pounds lighter than I was on Day 1.

April Fresh - A Healthy Les

When: April 16 through August 20, 2012

Daily Affirmation:
My Love For Myself Drives My Desire to Be Healthier.
Daily Goals:
1. at least 15 10 cups of water each day
2. take my Vitamin each day
3. at least 15 Minutes Prayer/Meditation Each Day
4. at least 30 minutes of cardio each day
5. No fast food

Staying Connected

noreply@blogger.com (Leslie McGraw) — Mon, 18 Jun 2012 14:08:00 +0000

Getting Connected

Sometimes I think it would be cool to go on a reality show about weight loss where I could just focus on weight loss for a couple months. A few years ago, my favorite show used to be Celebrity Fit Club. Each season, 8 overweight celebrities were taped over a course of 16 weeks while they were creating and building a healthy lifestyle and dropping weight. I was so into the "characters" that I would yell at the television when I thought one of the judges was being too harsh on one of my favorite stars. My favorite season was when Tempestt Bledsoe (Vanessa from the Cosby Show) and Bizarre (from D12, the Detroit Rap Group) were on. During one episode, Tempestt had gained weight during her weigh in. She said it was because she had been on her monthly cycle the week prior. The judges didn't give her any credit. I thought they were so unfair. The panel medical expert said that wasn't a valid excuse. With all the support she had, she could have made better choices. Since then, I think about that incident here or there while I am on my cycle. Yes. There is some justifiable fluctuation on the scale...but there are also a lot of choices. Bloating is temporary, the residual from the food choices you make during PMS or while on your cycle is permanent. Simple, not easy.

Staying Connected

About a month ago I wrote this: "I have been feeling disconnected - - from friends, family, my goals, and even my life. I have been so busy trying to get the person I want to be, I forgot to keep loving the person that I am now." I don't feel as disconnected anymore, but I have my days. The real issue presented during Celebrity Fit Club was about staying connected. Everyone had valid reasons for their weight gain: high-stress lifestyle, significant losses, public shame and/or depression, identity issues, failure, childbirth, getting older.... However, the show focused on weight loss. That was not, however, where the most time was spent. MANY hours behind the scenes were spent on getting to know each other, counseling, therapy, hypnosis, drug rehab, addiction recovery, medical treatment, helping their families to become supportive anchors instead of enablers, preparation, and dealing with their motivation to overeat. Everyone had a plate full of issues..but the common thread and focus remained on weight loss...for the show.

Why I Blog on Mondays

I know you probably think I blog for you. And I do. But, first and foremost, I blog for myself. Although I spend a lot of time on the "everyday stuff", I have to spend a couple minutes a few times a week recharging and refocusing and benchmarking progress on my goals. I have a long way to go - but I have come a long way as well. In this challenge, I have lost (a net of) ten pounds. Yes, I would have liked to have lost more. But, I am happy that I am taking it slow enough to really create healthy habits. As I took my measurements this morning, I took a peek in the mirror and I can see progress. That's motivation.

“Always concentrate on how far you’ve come, rather than how far you have left to go.” -Unknown

April Fresh - A Healthy Les
When: April 16 through August 20, 2012

No Pain No Gain

noreply@blogger.com (Leslie McGraw) — Mon, 04 Jun 2012 14:32:00 +0000

"People are taught that pain is evil and dangerous... Pain is meant to wake us up. People try to hide their pain. But they’re wrong. Pain is something to carry, like a radio. You feel your strength in the experience of pain." - Jim Morrison

Jim Morrison died before I was born but his words are always so relevant that I feel like he just wrote them. This week I lost a few ounces shy of 2 pounds. This brings my net weight loss to 10 pounds. It hasn't been easy - at all. I have friends that put in minimal effort - like starting a walking regimen or stop drinking soda - and lose weight. However, that has never been the case for me. And that's okay.

This week I was reminded how I need to focus on consistency and endurance - not random Olympics. After a steep increase in walking and running in high temperatures at the beginning of the week, I ended up sick and sore. While in pain, I realized how alive I felt. I have been starting to unravel some spiritual mysteries about myself. Although I have been feeling physically weak, it has been a long time since I have felt this spiritually or emotionally strong. I am sure the physical will be back soon!

April Fresh - A Healthy Les
When: April 16 through August 20, 2012

Be Honest With Yourself

noreply@blogger.com (Leslie McGraw) — Wed, 30 May 2012 09:00:00 +0000

Where Did the Week Go?

I can't believe it's Wednesday! There was Friday. Friday morphed into Memorial Day. Then Memorial Day became Wednesday. At least that's how I remember it. Luckily, I have been using DailyMile.com to track my workouts. Last week, after I realized I was stuck at the same 6 pound weight loss for three weeks straight, I decided to look and see what was going on. I was working out most days, eating right most days. At least that's how I remembered it.

Being Honest With Yourself

Over the past week, I have been thinking about this plateau I have been on. Maybe it's stress. Maybe I'm bloated. Maybe I need to intensify my workouts. Maybe I need to go on a traditional diet. Then I decided to do some research.When I looked up my workout history, I found some disturbing news about myself. I had convinced myself that I was working out most days. In reality, I had only worked out 9 out of 23 days. That's not "most days". In fact, that's not even half! On Sunday, I prepared a birthday meal for my mom. I had to throw out some fruit and vegetables...okay so a LOT of fruit and vegetables. If I had been eating at home "most days", there would not be so much fruit and vegetables to throw away. For further confirmation, I looked in my purse and looked at my receipts. My agreement with myself is that I would avoid fast food during the week and be open to eating out sparingly during the weekend. My receipts did not reflect this - over the past three weeks (the same time frame as my plateau). Being honest with myself kind of hurt, like I had let myself down. However, it was also a way to put myself back into the driver's seat with this challenge. I may have factors that are beyond my control - but that is NOT the reason I have been stuck. I have been stuck because I haven't been honest with myself nor have I been consistent. What I need is consistency and commitment that renews daily.

This week, I am down 2 pounds - for a weight loss total of 8 pounds. I have already put in work with my training and have increased my fruits and vegetables. Chocolate, ice cream and potatoes are still hard for me to stay away from. But, today I will stay away. Today I will be connected to my goals.

April Fresh - A Healthy Les
When: April 16 through August 20, 2012

The Next Step

noreply@blogger.com (Leslie McGraw) — Mon, 21 May 2012 09:00:00 +0000

The First Step

I am sure I have broken a record on the amount of weight loss and exercise books and literature I have consumed through the years. Every couple years there is a new breakthrough method or diet. Many things are different, but all the major ones start with the same step: Love Yourself. Different authors say it differently. I have read authors who say you should look at yourself in the mirror naked and love the image before starting your weight loss journey. Richard Simmons has often repeated his theory: "love yourself, move your buns, watch your portions" Currently, the newest iteration of this idea is in the book "Loving Yourself Thin."

I have been feeling disconnected - - from friends, family, my goals, and even my life. I have been so busy trying to get the person I want to be, I forgot to keep loving the person that I am now. This past week, I treated myself to a couple outfits and a (badly needed) haircut. I have been staying away from the stores and salons to remain on budget. However, I found some clearance items at a local Mother's Day Sale and $10 off a haircut at the local cosmetology school. $60 later, I am feeling good and renewed.

Currently, I am still at the same 6 pound weight loss from two weeks ago. This week, however, my entire goal is to just love on myself, spend time with myself (and my creator). So, my next step...is actually to get back to my first step.

I've missed more than 9,000 shots in my career. I've lost almost 300 games. 26 times, I've been trusted to take the game winning shot and missed. I've failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed. -Michael Jordan

April Fresh - A Healthy Les
When: April 16 through August 20, 2012